Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Time is Short
Things are moving fast with mom now. She has stopped eating all together and dad said she took very little fluids today. The Hospice nurse has changed some of her medication so it is much easier for her to take. Mostly they are making everything into a liquid form and she is getting it by syringe. She is also in a hospital bed now. She is no longer being transferred from bed to wheel chair or from wheel chair to anything else. She is also sleeping almost non stop. Dad said she only opens her eyes for a few minutes and then goes right back to sleep. I don't know the pain level she has, but Hospice has provided some very good medication to take care of anything that needs taking care of. We are now down to just days instead of weeks or months. (However, I have been wrong before so don't quote me on that.) I think this is about all I can say for now. Just know that our family is being taken care of. We are being comforted by our Heavenly Father. Though this is very difficult and down right awful, we will be okay.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Pictures Finally!
I am sitting at Dad's computer and he has some great pictures so I thought I would quickly get some on since I have promised these for a long time.
The first one is a picture of my mom when her and dad went on a cruise a few years ago. This will at least give some of you an idea of what she looked like before cancer. The second one is Joe Mike shaving her head! She was loosing hair so fast at this point that she, dad and Joe decided it would be better to have it shaved. Joe thought mom would look great with a moe hawk. I'm sure you can see how mom felt about that! The third is when mom and dad were sitting in the living room listening to Joe and Michelle's wedding. Mom had on her favorite hat with a tulip in it, her favorite flower. The last one was taken only a few weeks ago. It really shows my mom's personality. She loves to laugh. Even now she will smile and almost get a giggle out now and then. (Okay, they came up backwards so just know the bottom picture is number one and the rest go up from there.)
She has gone down hill since Ketra and I arrived on Tuesday. She is still her patient self she has been through this whole process. She tolerates all of us as we take care of her. She eats best for my dad. Well, she does everything best for my dad. And she still lights up when he enters the room. She knows too. She can recognize his walk and his voice instantly. She is however getting weaker and it is harder for her to stand and move in general. In reality, we almost pick her up to help her move around and reposition her. Ketra and I leave tomorrow and Derrick and Catherine will be in with baby Jayden later in the evening.
I still can't believe all of the love and support given our family. It is such a blessing to be 0n the receiving end of service. Thank-you again for all of your prayers, love and help.
Friday, June 26, 2009
On The Farm
I am here in Basin City with mom. She is doing well. She actually has a better appetite now than she did when I was here after Joe's wedding. She still has her wonderful sense of humor. She doesn't communicate very well, but occasionally has a five or six word sentence. Most of the time we get one of her prized facially expressions, raised eyebrows, or a huge smile. The smile usually means she likes it, wants it, or thinks it is hilarious. The other morning she said my name and that just about threw me for a crying binge. It is truly amazing the things I miss the most, like my mother saying my name.
Ketra is here with me. She is an amazing woman. She has cleaned more messes than I think I ever could and she whistles around the house. Of course most of the tunes she whistles are Elvis. Apparently mom has taken a renewed liking to the man. She has a TV station that plays all Elvis all the time. It is on almost 24/7. She taps her toes to it and enjoys the music. Dad was saying that they went to Spokane when they were first married and saw Elvis in concert. Apparently mom was a big fan back then.
She also really loves it when her friend comes over with her guitar and plays and sings for her. Ketra, Dad and I got to sit in the front room with them this week and watch something happen I didn't think I would see in the these final weeks. Mom would be in a dead sleep and Sister Eppich would start to play, "I Didn't Know the Gun was Loaded" (a really cute folk lore western) and mom would wake up and start singing right along with her. Whatever song was played that mom knew she was able to put all the words together and sing. It is amazing how much music affects us. Especially at this stage in mom's life.
Heather has come over almost every day we have been here. She has to take on a lot of the responsibility because all of us live farther away. She also does an amazing job and has four very active children. Heather, Ketra and I found this old box of pictures from our youth! Things from the time Heather was a baby and mom and dad were first married. Heather found some great protector sheets to put them in. We all really enjoyed looking at and remembering those times. It's just a wonder that a picture will bring up so many memories that you forgot you had. She also found a picture of Dad's office clean! That is something that is nonexistent in our parent's home!
There are lots of things that will happen in the coming weeks to my mom. Her body will begin to shut down and she will start saying her final goodbyes. I only say this because it might be too difficult for me to write very often. Or I may not have the time. So please be patient with me. I will get you information as quickly as I can emotionally and physically handle. We are all so grateful for my mom and what she means to all of us.
My favorite memory of my mom by Rachael:
When I was in my first semester of college I was more than just a little homesick. I would call home several times a week crying and complaining how hard it was to be away from my mom and dad. This was not new to me. I have always been a home body and never really liked sleep overs or camps. My mom finally got exasperated with me and asked if I wanted to come home and go to the local Jr college. I said no. I knew there was much fun to be had at Ricks. So she told me, in no uncertain terms, "BUCK UP!" And then she hung up the phone on me. Those two words are now a joke between us. She has lovingly told me to buck up every time Bruce has been away on training or a deployment or I have just needed reassurance that all would be well. It may seem like a strange favorite memory, but "Buck Up!" has helped me in every aspect of my life. Thanks mom! I love you!
Ketra is here with me. She is an amazing woman. She has cleaned more messes than I think I ever could and she whistles around the house. Of course most of the tunes she whistles are Elvis. Apparently mom has taken a renewed liking to the man. She has a TV station that plays all Elvis all the time. It is on almost 24/7. She taps her toes to it and enjoys the music. Dad was saying that they went to Spokane when they were first married and saw Elvis in concert. Apparently mom was a big fan back then.
She also really loves it when her friend comes over with her guitar and plays and sings for her. Ketra, Dad and I got to sit in the front room with them this week and watch something happen I didn't think I would see in the these final weeks. Mom would be in a dead sleep and Sister Eppich would start to play, "I Didn't Know the Gun was Loaded" (a really cute folk lore western) and mom would wake up and start singing right along with her. Whatever song was played that mom knew she was able to put all the words together and sing. It is amazing how much music affects us. Especially at this stage in mom's life.
Heather has come over almost every day we have been here. She has to take on a lot of the responsibility because all of us live farther away. She also does an amazing job and has four very active children. Heather, Ketra and I found this old box of pictures from our youth! Things from the time Heather was a baby and mom and dad were first married. Heather found some great protector sheets to put them in. We all really enjoyed looking at and remembering those times. It's just a wonder that a picture will bring up so many memories that you forgot you had. She also found a picture of Dad's office clean! That is something that is nonexistent in our parent's home!
There are lots of things that will happen in the coming weeks to my mom. Her body will begin to shut down and she will start saying her final goodbyes. I only say this because it might be too difficult for me to write very often. Or I may not have the time. So please be patient with me. I will get you information as quickly as I can emotionally and physically handle. We are all so grateful for my mom and what she means to all of us.
My favorite memory of my mom by Rachael:
When I was in my first semester of college I was more than just a little homesick. I would call home several times a week crying and complaining how hard it was to be away from my mom and dad. This was not new to me. I have always been a home body and never really liked sleep overs or camps. My mom finally got exasperated with me and asked if I wanted to come home and go to the local Jr college. I said no. I knew there was much fun to be had at Ricks. So she told me, in no uncertain terms, "BUCK UP!" And then she hung up the phone on me. Those two words are now a joke between us. She has lovingly told me to buck up every time Bruce has been away on training or a deployment or I have just needed reassurance that all would be well. It may seem like a strange favorite memory, but "Buck Up!" has helped me in every aspect of my life. Thanks mom! I love you!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
No Words
This is probably the hardest blog I have written since the very first one. Mom appears to be fine. She is handling this with the same faith she has had from the beginning.
One week ago last Thursday mom had a new PET scan done. This is the scan that does it all. Two days ago we received the results from that scan. I'm sure from the tone of this blog you have already guessed the outcome. We have suspended all Chemo therapy and radiation because it just won't do any good any more. The tumors in the brain have increased in size by 30% even though we did a very aggressive form of radiation to the brain. On top of that the Leptomenengial spread has increased to the entire cap of the head. We knew from the onset of the Lepto spread that it was one of the most aggressive forms of cancer, we just hoped we would be the ones to beat it.
As far as being in pain or discomfort mom shows no signs of this. She very rarely complains. And when she does it generally is a valid complaint. She has moments of being aware of her surroundings most of the time, but she does come in and out. Sometimes you think she is tracking a conversation and then you realize she has a far away stare on her face. Mom has shown such wonderful humility and acceptance of this way of dying from the beginning. She told dad not long after finding the cancer that she wanted to be around another couple of years, but if this is what her Heavenly Father had in store for her than that was okay. Once while she was talking to Ketra she said this illness was not a burden to her. I remember some months before finding the cancer that mom told me she had never had a real trial of her faith. I believe she has now. And not only has she had a major trial of her faith, but she is coming through with flying colors! If I could have a small portion of her acceptance and humility I think getting into heaven would be easy.
In the next coming days and weeks mom will simply start to sleep more and more. She may have more headaches as the pressure builds, but we have pain meds to help control that. One morning, afternoon or evening she simply won't wake up and then she will stay in a deep sleep until she finally passes peacefully.
Our family cannot express to you the thanks and gratitude we have for all of your wonderful and continued help throughout this time. We have felt loved and cared for in your actions, thoughts and prayers. We thank those who will help us as the time grows near and with the transition that will occur as we mourn mom's passing.
We also will be posting our favorite memories of mom. If you would like to post yours please either leave it in the comments section of this blog or e-mail Rachael @ remundhq@msn.com.
Thank you again for all of your love and support.
One week ago last Thursday mom had a new PET scan done. This is the scan that does it all. Two days ago we received the results from that scan. I'm sure from the tone of this blog you have already guessed the outcome. We have suspended all Chemo therapy and radiation because it just won't do any good any more. The tumors in the brain have increased in size by 30% even though we did a very aggressive form of radiation to the brain. On top of that the Leptomenengial spread has increased to the entire cap of the head. We knew from the onset of the Lepto spread that it was one of the most aggressive forms of cancer, we just hoped we would be the ones to beat it.
As far as being in pain or discomfort mom shows no signs of this. She very rarely complains. And when she does it generally is a valid complaint. She has moments of being aware of her surroundings most of the time, but she does come in and out. Sometimes you think she is tracking a conversation and then you realize she has a far away stare on her face. Mom has shown such wonderful humility and acceptance of this way of dying from the beginning. She told dad not long after finding the cancer that she wanted to be around another couple of years, but if this is what her Heavenly Father had in store for her than that was okay. Once while she was talking to Ketra she said this illness was not a burden to her. I remember some months before finding the cancer that mom told me she had never had a real trial of her faith. I believe she has now. And not only has she had a major trial of her faith, but she is coming through with flying colors! If I could have a small portion of her acceptance and humility I think getting into heaven would be easy.
In the next coming days and weeks mom will simply start to sleep more and more. She may have more headaches as the pressure builds, but we have pain meds to help control that. One morning, afternoon or evening she simply won't wake up and then she will stay in a deep sleep until she finally passes peacefully.
Our family cannot express to you the thanks and gratitude we have for all of your wonderful and continued help throughout this time. We have felt loved and cared for in your actions, thoughts and prayers. We thank those who will help us as the time grows near and with the transition that will occur as we mourn mom's passing.
We also will be posting our favorite memories of mom. If you would like to post yours please either leave it in the comments section of this blog or e-mail Rachael @ remundhq@msn.com.
Thank you again for all of your love and support.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Fun Pic's
These are some pictures I took in March when I flew in to help take care of Mom. This was prior to losing her hair. You can see her getting ready for her radiation treatment. The tech's were kind enough to let us peek in and snap some pictures. Looks like something out of Star Trek! You can also see my mom's personality shine through. She was so exhausted that she slept a lot and we only had a few conversations - but when we did she was telling jokes and making people smile. You can see her with her sister Vickie clowning for the camera with her "barf bag." I also got a few pic's with friends who had stopped in and helped me move a bed into the front room.
It's so strange to see someone who is always so animated and full of life to become different. But it's also such a blessing to see the best come out in those around my mom - my dad, for instance. And I can't even begin to thank the wonderful people who have sent cards, and made phone calls, and dinners, who have stopped in to visit my mom and help take care of her needs. It's painful to be so far away in her hour of need. Thank heaven for good people who care with their thoughts, prayers, and actions.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Same Old, Same Old
There is not much to report on mom this week. She is doing the same. The doctors are concerned with the lack of walking ability. There always seems to be no reason they can think of that mom has no ability what so ever to move. She is one unique lady and as always insists on being unique in her illness.
We do however have a PET scan set up for this Thursday the 11th of June. We will find out all sorts of information from this scan. We hope to know why she can't see. The eye dr. has scheduled his scan to coincide with this one. We also will get a good handle on how all of the treatments have worked. This will tell us where to go from here as well. The down side to this is after the scan is taken it can take a full week to get all of the results back. I don't know about all of you but I feel like pushing time faster to get at this information. It seems like having an illness is a huge wait and see game. Wait for the test results, wait to see if it worked, wait to see if something grows back, wait to see the doctor. What a test in patients. Not my strong suit.
Dad sounded tired when I talked to him. He and all the wonderful women who come to take care of mom are working hard. I worry about my dad. Please keep him especially in your prayers. He is handling everything in a stride, but it is never easy to see the love of your life go down hill. He is still working some and I know this gives him a much needed break. Not so much from the worry or the stress but at least something else to focus on for a few hours.
Thanks again to all of you for your help, prayers and reading this blog.
We do however have a PET scan set up for this Thursday the 11th of June. We will find out all sorts of information from this scan. We hope to know why she can't see. The eye dr. has scheduled his scan to coincide with this one. We also will get a good handle on how all of the treatments have worked. This will tell us where to go from here as well. The down side to this is after the scan is taken it can take a full week to get all of the results back. I don't know about all of you but I feel like pushing time faster to get at this information. It seems like having an illness is a huge wait and see game. Wait for the test results, wait to see if it worked, wait to see if something grows back, wait to see the doctor. What a test in patients. Not my strong suit.
Dad sounded tired when I talked to him. He and all the wonderful women who come to take care of mom are working hard. I worry about my dad. Please keep him especially in your prayers. He is handling everything in a stride, but it is never easy to see the love of your life go down hill. He is still working some and I know this gives him a much needed break. Not so much from the worry or the stress but at least something else to focus on for a few hours.
Thanks again to all of you for your help, prayers and reading this blog.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Downhill
I talked to dad today for the first time since Wednesday last week. He thought at first that mom was over tired from all the fun of Memorial Day weekend. However, she is having a very hard time even now. It seems she has not walked since Memorial Day weekend and has gone backward in several aspects.
She still eats like she has been. Not enough to keep a church mouse going. She sleeps more. More like a little kid than an adult. And she doesn't want to take her medicine. Just like a little kid. For those of you who go out to mom and dad's house to help out please see the LONG epistle I wrote before leaving last time. It has some info about taking pills. But you only have to read it if you feel the need. Also, it might help if mom is asleep because it's a book!
The Physical Therapist (PT) says she has regressed to primal urges. She tends to be very ridged for dad when he is trying to get her in and out of the car. He also explained that one of her hands doesn't work very well. Almost like she grips with it and can't let go. Only she doesn't have anything in her hand.
Dad also said she is cognisant some of the time. She sleeps most of the day again but every once in a while she will pipe up and be part of the conversation. She so enjoys every ones visits and the stimulation she gets from the talking. I really think that is one thing that keeps her going.
On the up side, dad took her to see Dr. Washington yesterday. But all he did was take some blood to check the meds levels. He will see her in a couple of weeks with the results.
Mom has one more day of Chemo, this Thursday, and then she has a full body scan, PET scan, to see where we are with her cancer. The eye doctor will also request a look at the optic nerve to check her eyesight at the same time. This PET scan will tell us where we stand with all of the cancer. I am feeling quite anxious for next week to come so we will have further information.
Mom also gets the royal treatment when it comes to bath time. Instead of having to go all the way to the bathroom and get in the shower, dad gives her a sponge bath in bed. Now be honest, wouldn't you love one of those? To not even have to leave bed in order to get all cleaned up! I'll take my shower time. It gets me away from the kids for ten whole minutes.
Not much more to report. We as a family would sure love to have some comments from you in Basin City. I for one would love to hear your take on things. We love and appreciate all you do. It is such a relief to have better help than even the medical field can provide. We all know mom is being loved and doted on. After raising us five she sure deserves it!
She still eats like she has been. Not enough to keep a church mouse going. She sleeps more. More like a little kid than an adult. And she doesn't want to take her medicine. Just like a little kid. For those of you who go out to mom and dad's house to help out please see the LONG epistle I wrote before leaving last time. It has some info about taking pills. But you only have to read it if you feel the need. Also, it might help if mom is asleep because it's a book!
The Physical Therapist (PT) says she has regressed to primal urges. She tends to be very ridged for dad when he is trying to get her in and out of the car. He also explained that one of her hands doesn't work very well. Almost like she grips with it and can't let go. Only she doesn't have anything in her hand.
Dad also said she is cognisant some of the time. She sleeps most of the day again but every once in a while she will pipe up and be part of the conversation. She so enjoys every ones visits and the stimulation she gets from the talking. I really think that is one thing that keeps her going.
On the up side, dad took her to see Dr. Washington yesterday. But all he did was take some blood to check the meds levels. He will see her in a couple of weeks with the results.
Mom has one more day of Chemo, this Thursday, and then she has a full body scan, PET scan, to see where we are with her cancer. The eye doctor will also request a look at the optic nerve to check her eyesight at the same time. This PET scan will tell us where we stand with all of the cancer. I am feeling quite anxious for next week to come so we will have further information.
Mom also gets the royal treatment when it comes to bath time. Instead of having to go all the way to the bathroom and get in the shower, dad gives her a sponge bath in bed. Now be honest, wouldn't you love one of those? To not even have to leave bed in order to get all cleaned up! I'll take my shower time. It gets me away from the kids for ten whole minutes.
Not much more to report. We as a family would sure love to have some comments from you in Basin City. I for one would love to hear your take on things. We love and appreciate all you do. It is such a relief to have better help than even the medical field can provide. We all know mom is being loved and doted on. After raising us five she sure deserves it!
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